I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
