Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
She swung at the pinata with crutches
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Randomize
