Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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