how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Hippo gnu deer
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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