Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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