Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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