I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
