I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Randomize
