I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
