GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
