Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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