I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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