You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Randomize
