we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
