oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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