I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
