I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
