Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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