He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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