no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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