no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
May the power of my ass compel you!!
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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