last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
