And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
This house was built for laser tag.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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