The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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