I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
soo... how was my night?
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
