i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
