dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Say something about gay babies.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
