doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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