Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
