That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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