let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
