hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Randomize
