I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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