People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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