awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
