Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Dignity is for republicans.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Randomize
