Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Is it because I queefed?
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize