In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
