Just took my morning after pill in the library
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
