You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
How does it feel to date your dad?
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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