this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
