If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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