So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize