After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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