do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
