This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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