You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
