so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
