marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
