well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
