Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Two words: blizzard sex
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
